Spiritual Guide | Inspirational Speaker | Lorraine Cohen

I’ve watched people suffering with health issues, money worries, and emotional suffering because they have been carrying around anger, blame, resentments, regrets and grudges for years.

How to tell when you haven’t fully forgiven?

• Current health problems, money struggles, relationship challenges.

How lovingly or unlovingly you treat yourself with kindness or harshness.

• Debt and financial struggles caused by past decisions.

• Relationships that feel unresolved.

• Revisiting/reliving painful childhood memories and past events that still negatively impact your life.

• How quickly and intensely you feel rage, anger, shame, and unworthy.

• The ways you sabotage your efforts (procrastination, busyness,destructive/addictive behavior, creating distractions and overwhelm..)

• How open your heart is to give and receive love.

• Feelings of righteous indignation that keep you stuck in victim consciousness.

There is ALWAYS a negative emotional energy charge

Which ones do you relate to?

You may believe you are better at forgiving others than yourself but the truth is that without self-acceptance and love, we cannot fully forgive anyone let alone ourselves.

Just saying you forgive another or yourself doesn’t make it so unless you embody the true essence of forgiveness. You cannot “think” yourself into “feeling” something. It’s an inner energy shift that happens in the heart NOT the mind.

What I have found is that when people are struggling with forgiveness the one they are the most upset with is THEMSELVES.  Being unforgiving towards yourself breeds self-hatred; separating you from your natural state of love and abundance.

Unforgiveness affects EVERYTHING - relationships, health, finances, success, your connection with the Divine.. Carrying pain creates a ton of stress that can powerfully compromise your health, wealth and happiness.

Forgiveness bring closure, inner peace and opens your heart to love again.

Forgiveness liberates you from suffering and return you to your nature state of abundance!

Forgiveness is freedom!

Your life is meant to be prosperous, meaningfull and joyfull!

On Wednesday,  October 23, I am leading a four week Journey through Forgiveness as part of my Pathways to Awakening Series.

Your life can begin to change in ways you cannot fully comprehend. That’s what happened for several people who came through the Forgiveness program several months ago and in the other Pathways to Awakening journeys.

Read their victories

I’ll show you how to take the next steps to liberate yourself!

Give yourself this gift and the world will also benefit from your act of self love.

Take advantage of the early tuition that expires Friday, October 18 at midnight EST. Choose from two payment options to make your registration easy.

2014 is coming fast. This may be one of the most important programs you attend this year to begin the New Year with power and passion!

Learn more about this life-changing program and sign up here

Love and blessings,

Lorraine

I awoke this morning with today’s article swirling around in my head. That’s how inspiration often comes to me from Divine inspiration.

I’ve had Self-Love on my mind and in my heart because I have been on a very deep journey of  “waking up” for the last few years. In fact what is true is that I have never felt more alive and aligned with my life path.

I am not the “me” I used to know or thought I was.  I am more aligned with my true nature and my prayers to have a deeper relationship with God have become a reality.  I believe one of the reasons I feel so much Grace and joy is because of my focus on self-love.

Love is our Divine nature and the Essence of the Divine. The absence of love separates us from who we are and God. Love is the bridge back “home.”

Below is a list of thirteen ways to love yourself which is really my list - the ways I love myself. This is a list that continues to expand as I do.

1. Commit to daily spiritual practices for stillness and communion with the God of your understanding. The relationship you have with your personal Divine is the most important relationship in your life. Prayer, meditations, journaling, inspirational reading, creating an altar, walks in nature, chanting, ceremonies and rituals…are all ways to deepen this most sacred relationship of love.

2. Ask for help when you need it. To be a great giver, you must also be a great receiver. Allow the people in your life to love you in return. And remember to invite the Universe to help – ask your angels, guides, Archangels, nature spirits… to be of service to you. Become helpless, which means acknowledging that you cannot do it all, all the time. Until you become helpless, God is helpless. “Let go and let God”.

3. Forgive yourself when you think, act, and do things in ways that are less than love. Each of us has done things that we regret, that have hurt another, or been unloving – resentments, jealousies, blaming, judgments…are expressions of inner pain. We cannot forgive absent of self-love and compassion.

4. Amend your inner self-talk. Become consciously aware of how you speak to yourself inside your head and what you repeat to others. Soften your language and choose words that treat YOU with love and respect. Look for ways to love your humanity rather than to condemn yourself.

5. Take responsibility for your thoughts, feeling and actions.  Be a great role model of integrity in the ways you choose to show up in the world. Make amends when you have messed up in your humanness, let go of the “blame game”, and look at life as a grand adventure for learning, creating, and evolving.

6. Make choices that allow your heart to be expressed. Giving permission for your creativity, passions, gifts, strengths, and talents to flourish opens pathways for greater happiness and prosperity. You might even feel your soul smiling with joy!  (I often do and it feels great!)

7. Set healthy boundaries and stick to them. Be willing to love yourself enough to say no and stop when you need to. Say yes when it feels right rather than from guilt or fear. Cultivate a courageous heart to teach people how to treat you by the ways in which you value yourself .

8. Surround yourself with emotionally safe people who positively support and love you.  Having a circle of friends who cheer you on, share your values, lovingly tell you the truth, kick you in the butt when you need it, celebrate your victories, compassionately listen (without fixing) when your heart is hurting can be a lifeline back to your true SELF on those days when LIFE feels hard.

9. Be willing to boldly go where you have never gone before. Dare to step out of your comfort zone to take those inspired leaps of faith that feel Divinely guided. Your soul would NEVER nudge you to do something that would put you in deliberate danger or cause you pain without purpose.

Doing the shadow work, inner child processes and walking through pain are pathways to liberation from the darkness of  past to the light of a brilliant future.

10. Do at least one thing every day that is personally pleasurable (I don’t mean something for another!).  Look for ways to nourish your mind, body and spirit. What makes you giggle with delight? What juices and excites you with joy?

11. Hydrate yourself with good, clean water.Invest in a high quality water system to nourish your body. Add a pinch of Celtic salt daily to strengthen water absorption in the cells of your body. You can be drinking plenty of water and still be severely dehydrated (I was!)

12. Eat healthy chocolate such as Xocai chocolate. If you are a chocolate lover, this particular raw chocolate is reported to have the highest antioxidant values on the planet. People regularly eating this chocolate have received miraculous benefits including ease with weight loss, reduction in joint pain, cardiac reversals, eliminating emotional overeating, heightened positive outlook….

13. Eliminate processed and fast foods. Choose organic, whole, and raw food options as often as possible. Consider the food sources you are putting into your body that can create future illness, aging, and affect overall well-being. Your body will thank you!

Exercise, getting regular dental and health checkups contribute to keeping your body at optimal health. How you physically feel affects every area of your life!

As you read this list, notice the ones you most relate to.

Which ones do you commit to regularly?

What would you add or change to be more self- loving?

The greatest wound that humanity suffers is a lack of self-worth.

The greatest gift you can share with others is love and it first begins with loving yourself! If you cannot truly love yourself, you really cannot love another with the full capacity of your heart.

It’s not your fault if you have difficulty being kind, compassionate, forgiving and loving with yourself. Your past experiences, your family dynamics, cultural conditioning has all shaped who you have become as a human being.

Withholding self-love is painful. It can feel like living in hell inside with no way out, because wherever you go, you take YOU with you.

What’s blocking your ability to be immersed in this love is within your grasp….

Ready to fall more deeply in love with yourself?

That is the opportunity I am offering you today.

On Wednesday, September 18, we begin a Journey into Self-Love for 4 consecutive weeks. This journey through Self-Love will provide opportunities to explore what love means to you, Divine Love, personal & inner integrity so that you can embrace your value and align with your true nature of love.

Register through Friday, September 13 midnight EST at a special tuition of $197. On September 14 the tuition goes up to $297.

What is unique about this program are the transformational meditations and deepening processes that are Divinely inspired and created right in the session. People report breakthroughs right on the calls!

Read about the program and the testimonials from past participants.

Imagine your testimonial there. What would you like it to say?

Learn more and register here

I believe it will be one the best investments of self- love you gift to yourself this year! And yes, you do desevre it!

Love and blessings,

Lorraine

“Forgiveness is unlocking the door to set someone free and discovering you were the prisoner.”

As I was returning from running some errands and thinking about my upcoming four-week Forgiveness program beginning on May 29, I began thinking about my mother..

When I was in my late 20′s my mother told me she no longer loved my father and that she was unhappy with her life. In my parent’s generation talking about feelings and thoughts wasn’t the norm.

The fact she came to me was huge. At the age of 27, I had no words to guide or console her. I was as lost as she was.

So, feeling stuck in the “bed she made” and too terrified to make any changes, she sucked everything back in and never spoke about how she felt again.

Five years later, my mother who was a vibrant, healthy woman, was diagnosed with leukemia. And at the young age of 66 my mother died.  She found a way to leave her marriage and her life.

I believe my mother was filled with regrets, self-anger, and a deep need for forgiveness that eventually turned into dis-ease. When she died, she was finally free.

That conversation with my mother was a life defining moment.

Years later I realized that I had been harboring resentments towards myself for not being able to help my mother in her time of need. Even though I worked through a lot of healing around feeling that I had “abandoned” her because I lacked the words to comfort and guide her, my breast cancer diagnosis in May 2012 revealed some deep unforgiveness I had not yet healed.

The relationship between your beliefs and carrying pain from the past stresses the auto-immune system to be vulnerable to create dis-ease. For the body’s intelligence to return to optimal health is a multi-level approach rather than focusing solely on the symptoms. Forgiveness being closure through peace and love.

Without forgiveness there is no closure; to no ability to let go and move forward. As long as you feel emotional charges anchored in anger, blame, resentments, and judgments, there is more forgiveness work to do. Learning “how to forgive” in your heart …is a process not a technique.

That is why doing the inner transformational work, working with healing modalities that feel right for you is so critical as well as having a strong community of spiritual support and a bond with God.

My health experience was full of Grace and blessings that allowed me to lift many burdens from my heart and my body.

That’s why I am so deeply committed to the inner healing and transformation work. I repeatedly say how critical it is to have the guts to look in the shadows. And that’s why I go into those dark places myself. I don’t want my life to be filled with regrets, anger, and resentments or to be too afraid to really LIVE. And I don’t want to create illness so that my life is limited by health conditions that could have been prevented!

Do you?

I feel my mother speaking to me today and reminding me of how heavy a cost we pay when we are lost in fear and suffering. How much we give up when we allow our fears and subconscious beliefs to hold up captive from fully living the life we were born to.

And how much pain we experience when we are separated from ourselves and that Divine spark when we resist the truth of who we are and live in our illusions.

Wherever you go, you take your stuff with you. And the only path to true liberation for your Light to shine brightly is THROUGH those dark places.

Suffering is a choice. Love and grace is your birthright. Forgiveness is the pathway to living a rich and vibrant life.

Love and blessings,

Lorraine

Relationships are the cornerstone of our life experiences that continually invite forgiveness.

Many people tell me that they can more easily forgive others and they struggle with self-forgiveness, harboring self-judgments, regrets, resentments, and anger.

From the many comments I hear and emails I receive, the depth of regrets, resentments, self-judgments, blame, self-criticism…that people are carrying is staggering.

Is that you?

Growing up, were you taught self-love and acceptance? Did you see forgiveness modeled in a healthy way?

Unforgiveness blocks the good that is yours to claim.

Unforgiveness separates you from your True Self and the Divine.  That separation is the greatest wound humanity suffers.

Unforgiveness affects EVERY area of life: health, money, relationships, success, well-being, connection to God…

Your life is evidence of how you feel about yourself and others.

That’s why I am inviting you to join me for:

Forgiveness: The Pathway To Inner Peace, Grace & Abundance

Tuesday, September 11, 1 pm/noon CT/ 10 am PST/6 pm UK

In this 60-75 minute call you’ll learn:

1. Why you can’t “think yourself” into forgiving and what you MUST do to let inner peace and Grace in.

2. Shifting forgiveness and self-love from a concept to embodiment.

3. How to tell when you are harboring unforgiveness.

4. Transcending the “Blame Game” trap.

5. The impact of holding onto resentments, judgments, anger, regrets on ALL areas of your life ( your health, finances, relationships, and self-love) and why it is  so critical to develop compassion, love, and forgiveness for yourself at this historic time.

The call will end with The Oneness Blessing which is an energy transmission from the Divine to accelerate inner healing and “Awakening”.

Register here even if you can’t make it live. The replay will be available for a  limited time.

Here’s to love

Lorraine

In my last article post, Guilt Free Self Care, I talked about creating a new definition for being “self -ish ” in the very best positive context of self-love and value. 

Let’s look at 7 areas of your life that could benefit from more TLC:

1. Negative stress. Where is your attention focused? What’s zapping your energy? If total elimination of all negative stress feels impossible, stress reduction is the next step. Consider how you might be contributing to your stress levels. Without realizing it, you might be creating more angst and drama by overcomplicating things and making life situations bigger than they need to be. One way we add more stress is by imagining worse case scenarios, problems, and what ifs.

Suggestions:

• Make a list of 10 promises you have made to others that are causing you stress, even if it’s stress you can handle. Reconsider those promises and give yourself permission to change your mind including offering alternatives that might be more aligned with who you are and what you can realistically say yes to. Sometimes we make promises because we fear other people’s reactions rather than to do what is right and best for us. Also, re-evaluate any promises you have made to yourself. Are you keeping them or breaking your word to YOU? Ouch!
• Identify the top three sources of negative stress and create a plan to decrease or eliminate them completely. If one of those sources is a financial burden and you have been struggling to manage it alone, get help. You can’t afford not to!
• Delegate things that need to be handled. Know what your strengths are. Install support systems to do for you what you can’t, won’t, or don’t do for yourself.
• Are you saying yes to people and things when you really need to say no? On the flip side, are you saying no to the people and things that would enhance your life quality?
• Take frequent breaks throughout the day for 10-15 minutes about every three hours
• Our mind continually cycles through past, present, and future thinking. Practice conscious breathing and come back into NOW.
• Resolve past conflicts.
• Deal with anything you’ve been avoiding.

Make your own list.

For additional ideas on what might be stressing you, check out my post on 7 Reasons Why You Might Not Be in The Flow and scroll down to #4.

2. Environment. Does your physical environment provide comfort? Do you feel energized or is it draining? If you have a home-based business, your office and home can be energizing or depleting. Creating an environment that includes sacred spaces to feed your spirit, nurture you during high stress periods, and provide a sanctuary -like safe haven for you to unwind makes a huge difference in life quality.

Suggestions:

• Revamp your home to be more restful and nurturing. Small changes can make a huge impact if you are on a budget.  Rearrange furniture, add colorful pillow and plants, or paint.
• If you don’t like something, fix it, change it, or toss it.
• Create a clutter free environment in and around your house. Clutter zaps energy and blocks flow. If you have a lot of stuff, start with small areas and work your way through it by taking 30 minutes to an hour per day. Invite friends to help you and make it a party!
• Bring in a professional organizer for ideas to make your home space work better
• Have a friend who has a great eye and knack for creating warm and inviting home spaces? Ask for help.

Make your own list

For additional insights read my article on Creating a Success Setting Environment 

3. Pleasure. What delights you and brings you joy? What activities nurture you the most? Make a list of the things that bring you the most pleasure mentally, physically, and spiritually and add them into your life. Include things that titillate your senses and pamper you!

Suggestions:

• Burn candles or play music to create a soothing ambiance.
• Spend a day at the spa for super pampering. Or, how about scheduling a fabulous hot-stone massage?
• Walk in nature or work in your garden.
• Cultural events like going to the theater, opera, or the ballet.
• Chill out with a good book.
• Sleep in a good bed with a quality comforter, feather bed, and high-thread count sheets. How luxurious!
• Have a special meal with your favorite foods (without overindulging so you feel bad!)
• Buy yourself a fabulous bouquet of flowers.
• Have a romantic evening with your special someone.

These are my faves. I could go on and on here…..

Make your own list

4. Well-being. What helps you feel centered and at peace? What activities contribute to your being at your best and feeling good? Commit to rituals of extreme self-care as a daily process, not a one-time program, to support greater life balance.

Suggestions:

• Identify your self-nurturing rituals and implement as many as you can each day. Meditation, yoga, inspirational reading, guided imagery, or burning incense are ways to connect with your spiritual center. I encourage people to take time every morning for spiritual practices before beginning work. 
• While holding a strong vision for the future, the only moment you have is NOW. Practice living in the moment.
• Cultivate your connection with God/Higher/Source. Daily spiritual practices will help you to access Divine guidance, intuition, and instincts inspired by love rather than motivated by fear.
• Begin a gratitude journal and appreciate all the blessings, gifts and miracles in your life.
• Set boundaries for yourself with others.
• Are there some things you always wanted to learn because they looked like fun? Take some classes.
• Forgive yourself for any judgments or upset you are holding.

Make your own list

5. Support and experts. Self-care is enhanced by the investment you make in all areas of your life, including enlisting the service of experts.

Suggestions

• Hire a personal coach who has a track record of helping others create work/life balance
• Work with a chiropractor, energy or other bodywork specialist knowledgeable in healing modalities
• Participate in programs and activities that enhance the quality of your life with professionals you trust and respect
• Surround yourself with healthy people who are loving and respectful. Build a community of friends, colleagues, and experts who lift you up. 
• Schedule time for your personal growth. Set aside time in your calendar daily, several times a week or on specific days for introspection, healing, and spiritual evolution.
• Socialize regularly so you don’t become too isolated, especially if you work from home.

Make your own list

6. Ingestion. What you put into your body affects your energy, behavior, concentration, mood, sleep and overall well-being. Have you been overindulging or abusing your body by not treating it as the temple it is. When health is compromised, quality of life suffers. How you physically feel affects everything you do or don’t do as well as how we show up.

Suggestions:

• Drink 8 or more glasses of quality water each day
• Practice tuning in to what you body needs and wants. Then do it!
• Eliminate caffeine and decrease/eliminate sugar. Watch your alcohol intake too!
• Eat more healthfully and treat your body lovingly by choosing fresh fruits and veggies, organic food wherever possible. Decrease or eliminate processed food. The long term investment in quality food  pays big dividends.
• Incorporate regular exercise that includes cardio and strength training. Buddy up with a friend, coach, or close colleague for additional support and accountability.
• Are you working too late?  Re-arrange your day so you are getting enough rest to be at your best.

Make your own list.

7. Appearance. When you look at yourself, do you like what you see? When we look and feel good about ourselves, motivation and inspiration naturally flows. And we can feel fabulous in a pair of sweats or dressed to the nines. Our inner joy and glow shines through.

• Toss every single article of clothing that does do make you look and feel great.
• Prioritize your hygiene. (When we get stressed or frustrated with ourself, we can fall into self-neglect!)
• Treat yourself to facials, manicures/pedicures etc.
• Compliment yourself in your head or out loud. Become your own cheerleader.
• Be loving towards your body. Thank your body for all the ways it shows up for you.

Make your own list

If you know you have a stressfull period coming up, create your self-care plan in advance. One of my clients travels around the country teaching seminars. Exercise and healthy eating is a priority for her. She often brings some snacks along and stays in locations that have a gym so she can get a good workout before her presentations. When she comes home, she leaves a full day open without appointments so she can catch her breath and get caught up with her business.  

Saying YES to taking great care of you is a daily commitment. Tuning in throughout the day will help you tap in to what you might need to be at your best. Be willing to stop, take several breaths, feel into your body, and ask, “What do I need right now?” and then do it to the best of your ability. If what you need can’t be handled in that moment, commit to responding to your needs as fast as possible. Make YOU a priority.  

When you are out of whack, every area of your life is affected including your business! Cultivate self-care as a natural behavior for you, not a temporary effort that keeps you and your life running well, happy, and abundant. 

You are worth it!

Cheers,

Lorraine
www.isayyesnow.com  

PS: Make an investment in YOU! Learn how to resolve the past, break through resistance and blocks to your abundance, use Universal Laws to your advantage, and create a more prosperous, loving life in my 13-week transformational course, Aligning With Destiny beginning September 8, 2020

Past students made breakthroughs with blocks they had been struggling with for years by applying the class principles, models, exercises, AND specifically using our hypnosis audios and meditations to shift subconscious beliefs and sabotage patterns. Save up to $200 when you register by 8/20. www.aligningwithdestiny.com  

FR*E*E TELECLASS Recordings! If you are ready to live your destiny, you don’t want to miss a spectacular panel of experts and luminaries as we discussed,  ”The Courage To Live Your Destiny”. Click here for the audio replays. 

In a session with a new client, I listened to her talk about how stressed and overwhelmed she felt managing all the responsibilities she has taken on in her life. She’s has health challenges and donates a good bit of her time for a non-profit that does outreach programs in her community. Right now she’s leading a project that will conclude at the end of the year.

 I’ve known her for a few months and, in that time, I have repeatedly heard her speak about how busy she is, how she feels she has no time for herself, and the desire to make some changes so that she can focus on fulfilling her life purpose and vision.

Her plate has become full for several reasons

• Lack of boundaries
• Inability to say no
• People-pleasing

So, what’s stopping her from making some of these changes?

Guilt

She says:

“I have commitments I made that I can’t break. One specific commitment I have is heading up a project for the non-profit. The original person in charge decided to step down and told me I’d be taking over. I was caught off guard and I said nothing. It’s not really what I want to be doing and I can’t just walk away and disappoint folks. I would feel GUILTY. I made a commitment and that’s about being integrity”. 

Hmmm I understand. Integrity is one of my core values and it can also be a double-edged sword. I believe we must have the ability to choose what we say yes or no to and be able to change our mind if we need to.  Without choice, we can feel victimized by people and situations; feeling trapped in a commitment that we feel bound by and stuck with.

I grew up with the cliché, “You made your bed so you have to lie in it.” That can mean too bad for you if you’re unhappy. You made a commitment and you’re stuck with it. Make the best of it.  That way of thinking used to keep people in unhappy marriages and jobs that often cost them their well-being, health, and their sanity.

You have a right to change your mind even if you made a commitment.

YES, you do.

You might be thinking, “C’mon Lorraine. You can’t just walk away from things just because you don’t like it. That’s pretty selfish and irresponsible. There are some responsibilities you have to do because other people depend on you”.

Absolutely so. I’m not talking about turning your back on people and responsibilities that really matter to you or being self-centered at the expense of others.

We all have things we do that might not always be fun and pleasurable; household tasks, paying bills, parenting, working…. depending on our attitude and energy.

Years ago, when I was doing my ministerial training, the topic of commitments came up. The teacher said that people agree to things based on what they know and believe to be true at the time. As people and situations change, the original commitment may no longer be the right choice and having the ability to modify or break a prior agreement is important so that we don’t feel trapped in our decisions.  The real commitment is to “self” – to who we are meant to be and what we are here to do.  

That way of looking at commitment really resonated with me. In that way we can continually be true to ourselves and show up for people in sincerity and authenticity.

Consider the choices and commitments you make that come for want and desire rather than guilt and fear.

If you say yes to someone or something because you feel afraid or guilty, how great is that? How about when you get caught off guard and say yes because you feel cornered and on the spot? Feel good?

Do we abandon ourselves to avoid upsetting others?

How does that choice bring real happiness to anyone?

In my opinion, the first place you must be “in integrity” is with yourself. To stay in a situation or relationship that might be costing you your health, self-esteem, valuable time and energy, money…. because you gave your word is a signal to re-evaluate your life. We create our own misery and suffering by being afraid to make certain changes that can be life-altering. Unhappiness affects every aspect of your business and personal life.

If we are fearful to show up for ourselves, how can we really show up for others?

Is it time to shift, modify, transition, or let go of any commitments you’ve made so that new people and opportunities can come into your life?

Oh,  my client? She’s transitioning out of the leadership position by the year’s end and will let folks know by the end of Oct. You should see her face as she talks about what’s next. She looks 10 lbs lighter!

Have an opinion or comment? Tell me what you think!

Cheers,

Lorraine
www.powerfull-living.biz

 

Five Reasons For Being Happy
By Lionel Ketchian, founder of Happiness Clubs around the country.

• How much happiness do you lose by waiting for it?
• You either have happiness or reasons for not having it, which do you think is better
• How much suffering do you bear by not being happy now?

 Cheers,

 Lorraine
www.powerfull-living.biz